“A friend loves at all times” Proverbs 17:17
It’s been almost a year now that I have been home with my son. I can honestly say that I spent the first ten and a half months of this year trying to defend my decision, purpose and place as a stay at home mom. There were times when I felt like people in my life did not understand my decision so I withdrew and sometimes isolated myself from everyone but my immediate family. At some point I found myself drowning in life because I was keeping so much inside and trying to figure out this new place in my life all on my own. I was like a suitcase that was clearly overflowing, but yet I was still trying to stuff more into it rather than pulling some things out and dealing with them. But, thank God for a friend who saw me in ten feet of water and threw out a life line!
The reality of it is that some people will not understand your reality until it becomes theirs. When I was single I “thought” I knew what it was to be a wife and said what I would and would not do and then I became a wife. When I didn’t have children I judged others on their parenting skills because I “thought” I knew it all. After all I was a Licensed Masters Social Worker and had a Bachelor’s Degree in Child Development…… and then I became a mother. Were some of my “thoughts” valid? Yes. Were some of them wrong? Heck YES! This is simply because some lessons in life can’t be taught; they are learned as you experience them.
The good news is that you are NEVER alone. No matter how much we try to convince ourselves that we are the only one experiencing something, there is always someone who can relate. A lot of times we just don’t know this because we don’t reach out. After that friend threw out the life line, I realized as a stay at home mom she experienced some of the same struggles, thoughts, doubts, etc as I did. Then I begin to open up more to another one of my stay at home mom friends and she experienced some of the same things as well. Here I was thinking, “poor little me, no one understands me” and all the while God had some amazing women right in my face. Grant it, their situation may not have been completely the same, but the concepts and principles were the same.
If you think there is no one, pray and ask God to send you “a friend who will love at all times.” After all, “iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17). We need someone to walk this road with us that can “sharpen” us and help as grow as a woman, a mother and friend.